


Baby, I'm A Little Insecure

by Belfire



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Cassandra is insecure, Depressing, Inferiority Complex, Insecurity, Internal Monologue, Sadness, after shower thoughts, comparing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-02
Updated: 2018-12-02
Packaged: 2019-09-05 17:55:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16815601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Belfire/pseuds/Belfire
Summary: Cassandra raised her eyes back to her reflection and noticed they were damp, puffy, soft tear trails glistening on her cheeks. She couldn't help but think over how all the people she'd listed in her head were all perfect in their own unique ways. They were all beautiful and confident and smart.





	Baby, I'm A Little Insecure

Cassandra wasn't an insecure girl, never mind that all her peers were everything she would never be. Beautiful blue-eyed blonds with big boobs and firm asses that seemed to have hypnotic properties every man was susceptible to.

Never mind that the girls in school were confident and smart. Who cared that they spoke with intelligence and a silver tongue when Cassandra struggled her way through a sentence, her eternal stammer and the words never taught to her as a child an obstacle too tall to climb over as fast as she wanted to. Her father never let her use words to communicate, of course, she wasn't good with them. But no one could know who she was or the reason behind her poor speech. 

Fresh from a shower with a soft white towel wrapped around her wet body, Cass stared at herself in the steamed up bathroom mirror. She stared at her eyes, dark brown and not clear sky blue. She stated at her lips, not plush and pouty but scarred from years of biting down on them from the pain of whatever punishment she was enduring at her father's cruel hand. Her hair was short and black, barely going past her jawline, the perfect opposite of the long luscious sunshine locks of all the girls in class.

It's not just the girls, though. The boys also made her want to curl up in shame and wear a bag over her head. Specifically, it was her brothers. Whenever she was around them, she found herself comparing. Comparing like she automatically always did.

Dick, the boy who tabloids claimed to be Gotham's hottest bachelor. Cassandra could see why they thought that. What, with his perfectly sculpted features and bright blue eyes, dark skin and darker hair, elegantly wavy, how could anyone think anything but that? He was strong, but not visibly so. Dick was built like a ballerina but was padded in all the places it counted. He could drop jaws and capture eyes wherever he was.

Then there was Jason. He hardly needed an introduction, but here Cassandra was monologuing one anyway. Jason was strong, built powerfully with tight muscle no amount of baggy clothes could hide. Although he dyes it black, his real hair colour was red, brilliant burnt sunset red and with the white stripe, Cass always thought of strawberries and cream. He had freckles, not many but enough to notice that it looked like a chef had sprinkled cinnamon on his face. His eyelashes were also unnaturally dark and long, framing an opalescent sea of green and blue.

Jason was the brother she was closest to, so she noticed little things about him most wouldn't, like the dimple on his right cheek. Cassandra though it was cute the way it showed when he smiled.

Tim. Tim was definitely another who fell into the dainty pretty boy category that Dick was already a resident of. His skin was perfect pure white, like alabaster, and he was lean but somehow, not runty. Despite all the crude things Jason said about him, Cassandra didn't see Tim as anyone less capable just because he wasn't built like a tank. He was slender enough to look elegant.

And those weren't even all her siblings. There was still Duke and Lucas, and then there were her sisters......

Cassandra raised her eyes back to her reflection and noticed they were damp, puffy, soft tear trails glistening on her cheeks. She couldn't help but think over how all the people she'd listed in her head were all perfect in their own unique ways. They were all beautiful and confident and smart.

Sniffing, Cassandra blinked back the stupid tears while she reached for a roll of toilet paper. She tore several of the wafer-thin pieces off, scrunching them up into a crinkly mess in her fists with more flash flood anger than she thought was justifiable. She shouldn't be angry because everyone else in her family was beautiful. Jealousy would only worsen the ugliness.

Thinking about Stephanie, blonde, busty, beautiful Stephanie with the bright intelligent eyes, Cassandra shoved the wads of damp paper into her towel and snatched her lemon yellow T-shirt off the crumpled heap on the ground, draping it over her head and tucking as much as her hair out of sight as she could.

When she stared back into the mirror, with her pale fabric hair and newly stuffed chest, for a confused second expecting improvement, she wanted to cry even harder at how obviously fake the modifications were. She just looked like a crying idiot covered in dirty clothes and soggy paper bits.

Her father would be ashamed of her if he could see her now. He'd strip and beat her with a bone-studded whip while an audience who'd laugh themselves hoarse watched. Father would rant and rave about the son he'd always wanted, but wasn't given. He'd remind her that all he had was her and she was a disappointment the likes of which he couldn't tolerate. Cassandra wasn't even a beautiful face fit for the family.

She was just an ugly failure, crying into her hands in the steamed-up bathroom while the toilet paper stuck to her wet skin and strands of her hair escaped the falling garment.

But no, Cassandra wasn't an insecure girl. Not when anyone was asking.


End file.
